younger siblings

i am the eldest of 5 children.three of my younger siblings happen to be girls which in lahore is tough.the first two are grown up and are fine.the younger one well shes going through the age where shes not only giving my parents trouble but is creating nightmares for me as well.she's in O-levels and this generation is just insane.i thought i was crazy but these people are dangerously crazy.every day i hear stories of more and more high schoolers doing crazy shit like exctasy and coke.im scared.in my time which was oh 10 years ago ciggarette was the tabboo thing..khair i consider myself the deprived zia-ul-haq generation.anyway my point is that im scared because theres an age and place for everything.in fact theres no time and place for certain things.im not worried about my sister right now but peer pressure can cause people to do wierd things at this age.i mean it wasnt so long ago that she was this sweet tender little angel.she's still an angel but a very rebellious one.lunches,dinners,gts.uff its too much.i dont know wat to do.cracking down isnt the option and frankly talking and explaining shit is useless as well cos they listen from one ear and out it goes from the other.i guess everyone at this age has to go through their own share of mistakes and trials.they have to learn themselves.all i can do is be the safety net.plus i have a ten year old brother who is growing up pretty fast.hmm...

wanted:inspiration

i need inspiration.lately i feel ive been going through the motions.ive been busy but i dont have much to show for what ive been upto.i want to feel high on life.i dont want my life to be mundane and routine based.i should be patient cos i know things will become really hectic pretty soon.its this interim period,this period of waiting that is driving me nuts.i have two projects going on right now.both seem to keep on dragging on and on cos a)theyre difficult projects and b)i dont want to rush things and mess things up.my livelihood depends on it.hehehe.plus my laziness kills me sometimes.this tendency of pushing things to tomorrow needs to end.plus i think i need to re-think this degenerate lifestyle i have going on right now.sleeping for five hours barely after 'socialising' every night does not result in productive work days.i dunno who came up with the concept play hard work hard.its bull.playing hard can only happen on the weekends.during the week its not happening at least for me.maybe im reverting back to my favorite pastime;making excuses!anyway im starting to feel a bit better now.ive given myself deadlines for both of my projects.two max three weeks.so heres to me being inspired,working hard,making money and going on a long deserved one week holiday to somewhere other than dubai or thailand.three weeks thats all i need to put in.three weeks!

its a fine day

ah what a beautiful morning.sun is out with a lovely breeze blowing.nice.its remarkable how weather can affect one's temperament.but theres nothing better to cheer someone up than to give good news.like i posted before, cricket is the only thing left that truly unifies us as a nation.as i was getting my daily dose of breakfast from my paan khoka(breakfast as in diet coke and pack of cigis,truly degenerate i am i know)i saw people with gloomy faces discussing how pakistan must have lost.the match ended at 3 in the morning so very few ppl would have caught the ending as i did.lucky me:)anyway the reason for their despondency was that Pakistan had batted first and done zilch.so when i told them pakistan had won they couldnt believe me.seeing the look on my face convinced them and two of them started doing the bhangra while the others quickly spread the word pakistan had won.i wish i had a camera because immeadiatly sullen faces just lit up.it was beautiful.90% of our population have hard lives.struggling just to get a decent meal during the day.ok i have a hard life because theres no cineplex in this city where i could watch all the hollywood blockbusters being released daily.how i miss being in the cinema.its hard but hey its life.anyway its great that people feel proud of something.its great people can find happiness.its great cricket plays a central role in most of our lives.i pray people can find more reasons to be happy and more things to be proud of.hey karachi people where have all the pirated dvds dissapeared btw?

well done pakistan.

even though the match is still not over but it looks like the pakistanis after displaying a commendable bowling performance are on the verge of victory.so well done and thank you.fantastic fighting performance.for me cricket is not about beating india.its about being consistent and being the best.Life's good.no problems right now.

pakistani standard time.

since time immemorial ive been hearing jokes about how we in Pakistan are not punctual at all.how we operate on pakistani standard time by arriving two hours later than we were supposed to.i guess when it comes to dinners,parties etc one can afford not to be puctual.though im sure that still concerns hosts but generally being late is considered to be normal.what i dont understand is people not being punctual about work and business appointments.i was just kept waiting for 2 hrs by some people who wanted to meet me.ok i admit i myself have been late here and there.but im a strong believer in punctuality.i dunno i mean business is business and as the old cliche goes time is money.anyway i was just thinking of excuses people come up with.tyre pucture,stuck in traffic(a very valid one these days),stuck in meetings(means i totally forgot),funerals,shadis,hospitals.a guy who works for me called me and said he couldnt come to work for two days as he was in sialkot attending his uncles funeral.obviously i condoled with him and gave him the days off.next thing i know his mum is calling me asking me where his son is cos he didnt show up at his place last night after work.turns out he was having a good time in murree with friends.i mean this episode has nothing to do with lateness,punctuality.its just a funny illustration of the excuses we make which just happen to be complete falsehoods.btw im the best at making excuses.in college i missed one or two exams cos i wasnt prepared for them at all or in one case i had overslept.so in order to give the exam later i would get this note from the campus psychiatrist stating that i had been suffering psycologically blah blah.no details just a paragraph or so and this note would work wonders.being sick also worked for me.the problem i had was that i wasnt visibly sick.i wasnt running a fever or experiencing a flu.so i used food poisoning and dehydration.so u c i cant pass judgements on anyone cos i understand.a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.enough for now cos as usual im not making sense.random!

day dreaming

this is the time of day when my mind seems to wander.its the time of year i guess.cos things are really hotting up fast.lahore summers are brutal and this year will be no different.when i was in college i used to think about taking the winter off and coming to pakistan and going back in summer courses instead.well those thoughts remained..thoughts and nothing ever happened.anyway thank god for mordern technology and a slightly better state of power supply.im rambling on cos im tired and am taking a break.sometimes i wish i could fast forward life sometimes i wish i could fast rewind life.i dont know why grass is greener on the other side but anyway lifes not bad.actually im having fun.i guess im a bit tired of having fun.hehe whatever that means.professionally i want to go 5 years ahead where im settled and growing.socially i want to go back five years when i was going off to college for one long party.i managed to sneak in some learning btw.nd life would be a bliss.but alas its impossible.but hey thats what days like these are for..day dreaming..

relative laziness.

im generall a lazy person or as i'd like to put it a laid back sort of fellow.but ive decided that i can absolutely Not be lazy in the land of the pure.being lazy in the states was so much fun.wanted cigarettes.pick up the phone.want food pick up the phone.want to buy clothings etc,go online.ah the good old days.here everything has to be done by one own's self.and im hating it.hehehe ive got it.ill hire 10 secretaries.unemployment in country goes down and i go back to being my good old lazy self.

air travel

kids under the age of 3 should not be allowed to board planes.or there should be special planes for them.i had two kids sitting behind me yesterday crying for the entire duration of my flight and by crying i mean wailing,shouting,jumping and kicking my seat.i even got plastic cups thrown on me.i love kids but just not on planes.

media cynicism in pakistan

ok.one cant blame us pakistanis from being cynical.but do we really have to be disingeneious.also i have hardly come across constructrive crticism in the papers.if God forbid one was to give an alternative it would be entirely untenable and unrealistic.media in Pakistan is prone to sensationalism and doom and gloom.i guess that sells.but does it hurt to mix in some positives from time to time.i guess thats why blogs have become so popular.people hardly read or cade about mainstream media anymore.i was reading newsline and its report on Pakistan's victory in india recently.the writer starts off by referring to inzamam as being over the hill when he went to india.i stopped reading the article there and then.he might have been a bad captain.heck he still isnt the brightest even now.but over the hill?how,where and when was he over the hill.this might sound stupid but this illustrates our local journalist's abilty to make sweeping and false statements.one thing is for sure and that is that yes ever since inzy became captain pakistan lost to india at home and lost to austrailia away but his own performance has actually picked up in the past two years.in fact he is one the most reliable and consistent batsmen these days.one goes to gatherings and you see sweeping statements being passed all of which happen to be negative in nature.our premier news channel geo often breaks news that usually turns out to be false.our dailies are either totally for the government or totally against it.no one except for the daily times gives u both the negatives and positives.and last but not least what about investigative journalism?newsline and herald's investigative reporting is limited to karachi or sindh at best.what about the rest of the country.nada!

pak's tour of the carribean

i have a feeling that the pak cricket team is going to let the india success get to its head.i pray it doesnt happen but somehow i cant shake this feeling.i feel as a nation we lets face it suck at sports.i mean a nation of 150 million should produce some medal winners at the olympics but alas no.cricket is the only sport we're relatively good at.heck its the only bloody thing that still unites us all.i bet people in dera bugti were glued to their tv sets on april 17th when we beat india to clinch the series.its the only profession that genuinely gives people from nowhere to acheive stardom and riches instantaneously which is fantastic.but coming back to the point i was trying to make we let success get to us so easily.we instantly believe we are invincible and then poof the next thing we know we're back to square one.but woolmer might be the key.lets see.i pray we win.on paper we should.

is wanting to make money a bad thing?

sometimes i feel guilty.cos in all honesty i want to make money and i want to work hard to acheive that.does that make me materialistic?does it make me an ungodly, capitalist pig?whats wrong in being materialistic as long as im not hurting others or in fact i might be helping others.which i like to believe i am.the point is i want to make money not because i love the smell of it or want to flaunt it.i want to because i want to be comfortable and help out others.that cant be so bad now can it?

good governance or "elections"?

in my humble opinion something has to give.in the 21st century and in an ever shrinking world, can a nation afford to spend years forming a stable democracy?will such an endeavour not lead to short term political instability?hence potentially harming economic growth.in a developing third world country isnt economic growth more of a priority?i feel that economic growth that leads to a betterment in the standard of living will inevitably lead to political freedom and democracy.economic growth will mean more people coming out of poverty,more people going to schools and universities and more people being exposed to the globalised environment.basically people becoming better voters.people becoming aware of their rights. in stead of politicians preying on for lack of a better word ignorant or helpless voters, politicians will have to earn their power.in pakistan this is exactly what is needed; good governance.forget elections or the sham politicians.just focus on delievering prosperity to the masses and see how in 15 years we will have a flourishing political arena.as long as the judiciary is not independent as it is in say india and as long as we have politicians worse than anywhere else in the world then lets just focus on achieving economic growth.china in a few years will have its elections.it is inevitable. but when in the future people read history they'll find out it was the communist party that gave prosperity to millions.it was a south korean dictatorship that changed the face of korea.it was mahathir's one man rule in malaysia that made malaysia and it was one party rule in japan that made japan.a benevolent dictator is better than our democracy.the hypocrisy is that the parties themselves arent democratic.do we have to endure cult based politics.for how long and to what end.?i apologise for my incoherent rambling.in conclusion i feel it is unfair to me a 24 year old growing up in pakistan and it is unfair to future generations to keep on having elections where the same people show up in parliaments and do nothing but plunder and terrorise.i for one do not buy the theory that if parliaments are allowed to finish their terms or if the electoral process is allowed to continue sooner or later things will work out.maybe they will maybe they wont.we dont have time to find out.so why not go the alternative route.the asian route.the successful route.finally there is no set roadmap.there is no law.there are only theories.India is a very rare example of a third world democracy achieving economic prosperity.but then all the Asean countries and china presently were not a democracy and look at what theyve acheived.

importance of ideology

Is ideology important?is it important for us to still be debating why Pakistan was formed 57 years ago.is it not sufficient that we accept the reality that is pakistan and get on with our lives and make this country prosperous.to the world we are known as Pakistanis.we arent Pakhtuns,punjabis,baluchis,sindhis, muhajirs etc.all of us have the green passport and almost all of us get discriminated against because of that.is not being born in this land enough to give us a secure identity?who cares if Pakistan was created for islam or was created for muslims.the point is Pakistan is here,might as well make it work.